More Verizon Broadband "Sucks" Wireless Ripoffs

There are many creative ways in which Verizon Broadband "Sucks" Wireless rips off consumers. Here are several ways:

When you sign on, Verizon locks you into a two-year contract. There's a big termination fee. However, if you don't need their broadband wireless service for an extended period, you can suspend the service -- for a $15 suspension fee.

But here's the real ripoff: The suspension only last 90 days. You must call Verizon again after 90 days, to re-suspend. Otherwise, Verizon reactivates your service and starts charging you.

Why not allow you, the consumer, to keep your wireless suspended until you're ready to use it again?

Because Verizon hopes you'll forget after 90 days. Then Verizon can reactivate, and you won't know until you see your bill. And you'll have to re-suspend, plus pay for the time your wireless card was on, but you didn't use it, since you thought it was suspended.

I suspended my card in July, wrote down on my calender that I had to re-suspend in October. Only I re-suspended on October 11, when I should have re-suspended on October 4 (I am told), so now I'll be charge for 7 days usage that I never used.

This "automatic re-activation after 90 days" is all very sleazy. But Verizon gets still sleazier. Here's how:

Verizon doesn't tell you that you can suspend their service. In all the promotional junk they use to tout their service (coverage, how great it is, how much it costs, the two-year service contract), I've never seen any mention that you can suspend the service.

In past years, I left my broadband wireless service on for months of non-usage, because I figured I'd need it again in a few months. Verizon never told me I had the option to suspend. I had to stumble upon that little factoid.

How so?

I called to terminate my two-year contract in July, though I had six months left on it, and only then did Verizon tell me about their option to suspend for 90 days (and you'd better keep track when those 90 days are over).

BTW, Verizon Broadband Wireless is as slow as molasses, with frequent drop-offs. I only use it because I need internet when I travel.

I've used it in Queens, NY (slow), in Denver, CO (extremely slow), and in Santa Monica, CA -- where it doesn't even work.

My Verizon cell phone also has difficulties in Santa Monica. My surfing the internet shows that Verizon wireless services often fail near the beach, and Santa Monica is a beach town.

If you travel and need broadband wireless, you may have no choice but to be ripped off by Verizon or some other carrier, but know that you are being ripped off.

Hollywood Witches's First Two Reviews

Hollywood Witches has begun to rack up reviews.

Steven Martinovich of Enter Stage Right says:

"Though the inner machinations of Hollywood have been well explored by both writers and filmmakers for decades, Hollywood Witches is still an entertaining read if only because of its unique premise. It obviously targets the liberal pretensions of Hollywood and one could argue that its villain, Däagen, has a point when she argues that diversity in Hollywood is a myth – though her agenda promises to do little to rectify the problem.

"It has genuinely humorous moments and although the witchcraft angle leads to some rather incredulous plot twists, overall it serves its subject matter well."

And Lars Walker of The American Culture writes:

"The chief eponymous witch of the story is Diana Däagen, a figure of satire, gargantuan in her vices and terrifying in her lack of self-awareness. A failed actress, she now works as 'development executive' in a movie studio. She believes herself intensely spiritual and full of love for all humankind, but that doesn’t prevent her from treating her underlings like dirt, using black magic to thwart or kill her enemies, and planning to murder thousands of people at once -- all for enlightened, politically correct purposes, of course...

"Author Sipos has a gift for dialogue (promising in one who -- one assumes -- is a screenwriter), and can be very funny... Hollywood Witches is a commendable effort, which will entertain readers with strong stomachs."

First Halloween Sighting in 2010 -- August 13th

Halloween being my favorite season of the year, I like for it to begin early and last a long time. By Halloween season, I mean all the decorations, store items, lawn displays, haunted houses, etc.

In 2007, I made my first Halloween sighting on August 7th. That was my earliest sighting to date.

This year, my first Halloween sighting was on August 13th. I was at Wilshire West Car Wash in Santa Monica, CA. They sell greeting cards there, among other items, in the waiting area. Halloween cards were already on display, despite it being over 2 1/2 months away.

BTW, if you want to watch a horror film on Halloween, the best Halloween horror film remains Halloween III: Season of the Witch. This was supposed to be the Halloween series's new direction. From this film onwards, no more Michael Myers. Instead, a new film installment every year, with an entirely different story and cast of characters.

It didn't work out. Halloween III: Season of the Witch was a critical and box office bomb. The fans wanted more Michael Myers. But I disagree. The first Halloween film was great, but it should have been the last Michael Myers film. The series went progressively downhill after the first film, with the notable exception of Halloween III: Season of the Witch, which told a most Halloween appropriate tale, returning the holiday to its dark Celtic roots.

Halloween H20 is the only Halloween/Michael Myers sequel worthy of the first film, taking the story arc full circle, with a darkly innovative performance by Jamie Lee Curtis.

Amber Benson at the Viscera Film Festival

On July, 17, 2010, I attended the Viscera Film Festival, which I covered for the Hollywood Investigator. Founded by Shannon Lark and Heidi Martinuzzi, the Viscera is a horror film festival devoted to "horror by women." To win a Viscera Award, a film must be created entirely by women, in front of and behind the camera. Lark also founded the Chainsaw Mafia film collective, while Martinuzzi runs FanGirltastic.

  One nice thing about horror film festivals, apart from seeing horror films, is the chance to meet horror celebrities. Among the people I met was Amber Benson, perhaps best known for her role on Buffy the Vampire Slayer, though she's appeared in many other horror films (e.g.Intermedio and One Eyed Monster). Benson is also an author. 

 An old cliché is how "nice" celebrities are in person, but Benson's affability seemed sincerely. Asked to pose for a photo, she behaved as though she were the one receiving the favor. Every year I run the Tabloid Witch Awards horror film contest and festival. I follow the screenings with panel discussions with the actors and filmmakers. I want every film represented, but since there are so many short films, a constant concern of mine is that the panel may end up crowded. I like small, intimate panels, so we can have a discussion. I thus have a rule: only one representative from each film can sit on the panel. I worry when I have over four people on a panel, and have (luckily) never had more than eight. Time constraints often prevent breaking up a panel into two smaller panels. I guess Viscera was also constrained by time. They had only one panel -- with over 20 people participating! Even so, everyone seemed to have a good time, audience and filmmakers alike. 

 

Lenovo Offers Crappy Support

I'm still trying, now and then, to fix my Thinkpad T40's problem.

A friend tells me that my problem is that since I replaced the hard drive, installing a new Hitachi TravelStar 80 gig 7200 rpm drive in a laptop that was released in 2003, I likely need to update the BIOS. He says this can easily be done. Just put the new BIOS onto a USB flashdrive. When the laptop boots up, it will first go to the USB port, and update the BIOS.

I don't know if that's easy. I went to the Lenovo website, searching for the right BIOS update. Nothing clearly related to my hard drive, and no mention of a BIOS update that can be put on a flash drive. Instead, the website was full of info on how to burn the BIOS update onto a DVD.

So I called Lenovo's toll free help line. Plodded my way though their horrible and annoying phone menu. (Are there any large companies that don't have horrible and annoying phone menus?) I finally connected to a live person.

I spent more time giving him all sorts of numbers from the underside of my laptop. After which he told me that my laptop was past warrenty, so I didn't qualify for assistance on the free help line. He said I could only seek help on the website.

I know my laptop's past warranty. I'm not looking for Lenovo to replace the hard drive or DVD drive. (I already replaced both, out of my pocket -- and bought a new edition of Windows XP since Lenovo doesn't include Windows DVDs with their systems.)

I told the customer service rep that all I wanted was for someone to email me the correct BIOS update. He said I didn't qualify for help on the phone line, and "I am now disengaging this call."


His exact word. "Disengaging." I was "disengaged" by Lenovo. A nicely sterile way of saying "F--- you."

I felt like I was brushed off by Hal 9000.

Since both Lenovo and the HAL 9000 have roots in IBM (even if unintentional), this seems appropriate.

Hollywood Witches Is Now Available in Trade Paperback

Hollywood says it loves equal opportunity and multicultural diversity. Development executive Diana Däagen thinks the studio's hiring is based more on ageism, sexism, and nepotism.

And so, surrounded by followers of Wicca, astrology, Native American shamans, telephone psychics, UFO prophets, a channeled warlord from Atlantis, and the alchemy of Hermes Trismegistus, Diana's coven of New Age witches hatch a plot to infiltrate and diversify the entertainment industry until Hollywood "looks like America" -- no matter how many eggs must be broken along the way.

Only the intrepid supermarket tabloid reporters of the Hollywood Investigator and Weekly Universe family of family publications can stop Diana's path toward world media domination.

Hollywood Witches is an urban fantasy/satire, available on both paper and on Amazon Kindle.

What's My Thinkpad T40's Problem?

I own a Lenovo Z61m (bought 2006) as my main laptop, but I still used my T40 (bought 2003) as a backup.

Recently my T40 began having problems. I tried to restore it to its original Windows XP Pro settings via the Access IBM button, but the whole thing crashed and refused to work.

I changed the BIOS to boot from the DVD drive, and tried installing Linux onto it (to save money -- why buy a new operating system for a 2003 laptop?), but always got errors messages (that vary) partway into the installation.

Messages like:

The following file did not match its source copy on the CD/DVD/target/lib/firmware/atmel_at76c503-rfmdaccbin

Or:

[Error 2] No such file or directory:'rofs/var/lib/dpkg/info/hplip-data.nist'

Or:

ERROR 5 INPUT/OUTPUT ERROR

Or:

ERRORS FOUND IN 52 FILES

Some of these errors suggest I might need to clean the DVD or DVD player, but I tried 4 different Linux DVDs; three Ubunto, one Fedora. Two were newly bought, pristine Ubunto DVDs, the other two were scratchy DVDs borrowed from the library.

Eventually I replaced the hard drive with an 80 gig Hitachi Travelstar, 7200 rpm. The problems persisted.

So I replaced the DVD optical drive. The problems persisted.

So I bought a new copy of Windows XP. The problems persisted.

Now I have a 2003 Thinkpad with a brand new hard drive ($120), DVD drive ($50), Windows XP Pro ($50), and two new copies of "free" Ubunto Linux ($30). And it still doesn't work.

A friend suggested I need to update the BIOS firmware so it recognizes the new Hitachi hard drive. I don't know how to do this, or if that's the problem.

Anyone know how I can I fix my T40?

You Can Read a Kindle -- Without a Kindle

Want to read socio-political satires such as Hollywood Witches, Pentagon Possessed, Manhattan Sharks, or Vampire Nation on a Kindle -- but don't own a Kindle? Don't fret! 

You don't need a Kindle to read a Kindle ebook. You can read Kindle ebooks on your laptop, cell phone, iPad, or many other devices by downloading these free Kindle apps from Amazon!

Hollywood Witches Finally Available

Hollywood says it loves equal opportunity and multicultural diversity. Development executive Diana Däagen thinks the studio's hiring is based more on ageism, sexism, and nepotism.

And so, surrounded by followers of Wicca, astrology, Native American shamans, telephone psychics, UFO prophets, a channeled warlord from Atlantis, and the alchemy of Hermes Trismegistus, Diana's coven of New Age witches hatch a plot to infiltrate and diversify the entertainment industry until Hollywood "looks like America" -- no matter how many eggs must be broken along the way.

Only the intrepid supermarket tabloid reporters of the Hollywood Investigator and Weekly Universe family of family publications can stop Diana's path toward world media domination.

Hollywood Witches is an urban fantasy/satire, debuting as an Amazon Kindle ebook. Look for a paper edition later in 2010.

My Horror Film Aesthetics Book Out This May

This May will see the released of my new book, Horror Film Aesthetics. What's it about? Here is an excerpt from the Preface:

"This is a book about horror film aesthetics. That sounds abstract and theoretical, but quite the contrary, this book is intended to be pragmatic. A practical and useful guide for aspiring horror filmmakers. This book analyzes how various cinematic tools -- acting, makeup, costuming, set décor, framing, photography, lighting, editing, and sound -- have been used by past films to effectively (or in some cases, ineffectively) create horror on screen.

"This book is an 'aesthetic how to' guide for horror filmmakers. Not to help them copy past films, but rather, to spark their imaginations. To expand their understanding of the horror genre -- its nature and appeal to viewers -- and their appreciation for the full creative potential of their film and video equipment. Aspiring filmmakers often read technical manuals to learn what the buttons on their cameras do, but they don't bother to learn how to use those buttons creatively. I know this as a horror film fan, critic, and journalist, and also from screening films for the Tabloid Witch Awards horror film contest and festival, which I founded in 2004 and continue to manage.

"This is not a book about how to use film and video gear. This is a book about how to use film and video gear effectively. In a way that conveys your horror story and themes in a clear, entertaining, and frightening manner.

"Student and independent filmmakers should find this book useful, but it is also intended for the hardcore fan. I hope this book will enable fans to 'see things' in horror films they may have previously missed, and thus gain a deeper appreciation for the genre. An appreciation that leads to greater viewing pleasures."

Verizon Wireless Broadband Disconnects

Not only does my USB Verizon modem disconnect a few times every hour. But when I try to reconnect, Verizon's program insists that the modem is still running "in another session." So I can't reconnect.

I close the program. I pull out and reinsert the modem. Yet when I run the program again, it sometimes still insists the modem is "in another session."

The only way to fix it is to reboot the laptop entirely. Very time-consuming and annoying. It can take an hour to send a few emails.

Verizon Broadband Wireless is only to be used as a last resort, for when there are no other connection options.

Verizon Broadband Wireless Still Sucks

I've been using Verizon Broadband Wireless on and off for about four years now. I always sign on when I travel, then cancel soon after because the service is so bad.

Verizon Broadband Wireless is not "scary fast." It's slow. Disconnects are frequent. Sometimes every few minutes. This was true with their PC card. It's true with their USB modem.

Only use it if you have to. I'm using it now, and I hate it.

Amazon Kindle and Sony eReader Self-Publishing

Last year, Amazon introduced its Kindle ebook. This year, Sony introduced its ereader, which Barnes & Noble is marketing under the Nook name.

I expect consumers to support only one format, and I think Amazon's Kindle will win. I certainly hope so.

For one thing, Amazon makes it easy for authors to self-publish their books, articles, short stories, scripts, poems, whatever, on Kindle. One need only open a Kindle account. You upload your book, and set the price, and it becomes available on Amazon.com.

Amazon requires a minimum price of 99 cents. They take 35% of what you collect.

I've uploaded two of my novels onto Kindle: Vampire Nation and Manhattan Sharks.

I priced them at $1.99. I uploaded Vampire Nation in late June, and Manhattan Sharks only last week.

It's easy. Any author can do it.

Sony only recently opened itself up to self-publishers. I've yet to upload anything onto Sony, but by and by.

In Praise of 1980s "Concept Music Videos" and Literal Music Videos

I've long been a fan of Meat Loaf, Bonnie Tyler, and Jim Steinmen (who wrote the best songs for both those singers).

I also remember the peak of music videos, the early 1980s. Back then, singers didn't have much influence in music videos, rather, the director was king. This was because singers didn't understand this new format, while directors did.

And one of the leading music video auteurs was director Russell Mulcahy, who established many of the format's early cliches: smoke effects, widescreen black bars, objects breaking in slow-motion.

Mulcahy did "concept videos," as opposed to "performance videos." Concept videos emphasized an abstract, metaphorical interpretation of the music, in which the singer, and the lyrics' literal meaning, was downplayed or even ignored. Performance videos focused on the singer (e.g., Michael Jackson's Thriller.

As singers came to understand the format, they took charge -- taking charge of "their own music" as they saw it. I think that spelled the death of music videos as an art form. Allowing singers to control "their" music videos is like allowing film stars to control "their" films. A film is collaborative. The actors and music composer play a role, but the director should take the lead.

Mulcahy directed many of Kim Carnes's videos, and Bonnie Tyler's Total Eclipse of the Heart. Brilliantly abstract, metaphorical concept videos.

I've just discovered satirical "literal music videos," which redo the lyrics to match the images. This naturally works better (is funnier) with concept videos, rather than performance videos.

And naturally, there's a "literal music video" for Mulcahy's Total Eclipse of the Heart.

Yes, I think it's hilarious. It's been years since I've seen the original video, or even listened to the song. But seeing its "literal" parody, aside from inspiring laughs, also makes me appreciate Tyler, Mulcahy, and Steinmen that much more -- and wish it was the 1980s all over again.

Fallen Angels: Slick But Still a Boring Mess

Fallen Angels boasts all the usual modern horror film visuals (i.e. clichés). Quick MTV edits, grim desaturated colors, gore, etc. Even so, the film is a boring mess.

Confused story. I don't think I would have known what was going on, except I'd read the DVD box before hand, and the characters kept filling me in on stuff they'd learned. (And I'd wonder: how did they figure that out? -- it's not in the film.)

Films opens with stereotypical drunken, horny teens. One's killed, another's kidnapped. Then we're at this prison about to be torn down. We find skeletons in the basement. The FBI comes in to investigate. Turns out many skeletons are over 100 years old.

People die. Some from demons, some from a killer. We find more skeletons. Killed by different people.

More people die, seemingly at random. In the end we learn it has something to do with 7 demons in charge of the 7 deadly sins. Yet I can't really figure out which thinly sketched character was supposed to be guilty of which sin.

Also, a mother is seeking her kidnapped daughter. And an FBI agent discusses his early years as a pastor in Mexico. Where some demon-possessed boy was killed by vigilante villagers.

The FBI agent/pastor also converses with a demon. This demon has really cheap makeup, like in a sitcom. He sounds like some whiny character from a Jerry Seinfeld episode.

I won't give a spoiler, but know that the ending is really unexpected, in a weird way. Not entertaining. Not gripping or anything horrific. Just out of the ballpark.

The production values are slick. But the acting is flat, and the writing is awful.

The best 7 deadly sins film is THE DEVIL WALKS AT MIDNIGHT, aka The Devil's Nightmare. An early 1970s Euro-horror film.

Communist Zombies

I've not been posting much lately, as I've been working on my book on horror films. Observations that might have been posted here are instead going into my book. More on that later.

In the meantime, here's a video about Communist Zombies (technically, Stalinist Zombies, but it's all the same):

The Caretaker: Not Scary, Not Funny

Turkey Ranch Productions sent me a review copy of The Caretaker, which is good a bad. It's nice to get a free horror DVD, but it obligates me to review it, which is bad if I didn't think much of it.

The Caretaker is a very short, very low budget affair. Only an hour and 17 minutes long (not including credits).

These generic teenagers meet outside a school dance on Halloween night. And they stay outside. We never go into the building and see the dance itself. (I said this was a low budget affair.)

How low budget? Only a few locations. Most of the film was shot at and around a farmhouse (a few rooms and a field) and inside a limo. Then brief scenes outside the Halloween dance, and in a girl's bedroom, and in a "gym" (it could have been the producer's basement.)

Anyway, the teens meet up outside the dance. The guys had rented a limo, and they take the girls to an abandoned farmhouse, where they'd planned to scare the girls. But it turns out their "scary story" of an insane caretaker is real ... and the caretaker has returned from the asylum (or wherever) that very night ... and, as you might guess, the body count mounts.

The DVD box's marketing is pretty brazen, calling The Caretaker a "classic teen scream." Based on what?

The box brags about the film's "ensemble cast of ridiculously good-looking kids." Well, no. They're good-looking, but only in a bland, generic sense. None of them display any charisma or outstanding beauty.

The cast's bland good looks are matched by their bland acting, as they mouth bland, flat writing.

The promo material that came with the DVD is accurate when it says the film is low on gore. It also positions The Caretaker as the next Scream, promising "laughs and camp."

Yes, it's low on gore. But it's also low on laughs.

The Caretaker is a numbingly unoriginal film, even by slasher standards. I suspect this may be intentional. As "camp," it probably hopes to satirize horror film clichés.

Bad choice. This film is not funny. And for good reason. These horror film clichés were old when Scream attempted to satirize them in 1996 (although Scream had more energy than The Caretaker). These clichés had already been targeted by 1981's Student Bodies.

There's nothing left for The Caretaker to satirize. Its targets are so old, I couldn't even find any attempted jokes until nearly an hour into the film, when the Jennifer Tilly character started talking extremely idiotically. I then thought, okay, I'm probably supposed to laugh at this. I can see how somebody might think this is funny, in an insipid sitcom sense.

Tilly's character is so dummied down, she just mugs for the camera, no real acting. Judd Nelson has a few minutes of screen time in a cameo.

I suspect (I'm guessing here) that the "jokes" are supposed to be that the characters (mostly teenagers) are stupid. But many horror films are already so full of stupid teenagers that "satirizing" stupid teenagers becomes difficult. The Caretaker's stupid teenagers aren't really any dumber than typical horror films' teenagers.

The Caretaker does attempt to "update" its story, such as when the teens say, "This happened in, like, ancient times. Like, the 1980s." (Ho! Ho! -- How that for belly laughs? It's about as funny and original as this film's dialog gets.)

There's nothing new in The Caretaker, either as satire or as horror.

It's an okay film, I guess. Horror completists may wish to check it out, provided they can get it dirt cheap in the bargin bin.

Gargoyles Inconsistencies

I was watching Gargoyles, and some thoughts occur:

1. The introductory, voice-over monologue claims that gargoyles arise every 600 years -- though later in the film, the head gargoyle claims his group has not been alive for the last 500 years. He also claims that his group had only arisen (they hatch from eggs) a few weeks ago.

So then ... how is it that he knows English? And standard American English at that?

I mean, these gargoyles are based in the American southwest. There were no English speakers in the southwest even 500 years ago.

For that matter, where'd he get that European book which was apparently written in 1417?

2. Many gargoyles have beaks (the females also seem to have feathery fur). How come the head gargoyle has lips, no beak? Different races of gargoyles within the same hatch? But that's a pretty big anatomical difference.

Gargoyles is full of other inconsistencies and oddities, but why be picky? Many fine supernatural/horror TV movies were produced in the 1970s (most of which were produced for ABC), and Gargoyles ... is definitely one of them.

Hey, I like it. It's got cute Jennifer Salt (Sisters) and the late, great Grayson Hall (Dr. Julia Hoffman of Dark Shadows). Gargoyles is not a great classic, but it's worth checking out.

No "Last Girl" in House of Death

I had a stack of free DVDs before me. I get them because I'm eligible to vote for the SAG Awards. I began watching 3:10 to Yuma. I removed it after 5 minutes. I'll watch it another time.

Why watch some brand new, big-budget Hollywood studio release, when I can instead watch House of Death, a crappy, ultra-low budget 1981 slasher film that I'd only seen twice before?

And House of Death is as crappy as they come. I mean that in a good way (i.e., many, if not all, hardcore horror fans will be forgiving of its weak points, and still find things to enjoy). I did.

The film was shot in North Carolina, with a cast of unknowns (of which my favorite was "Sara", one of the earlier victims and played by Sharon Alley). It opens with a young couple killed while having sex. (How original is that?) Then there's nothing much for the next 40 minutes. Just "exposition" as we follow high school grads, soon to attend college, enjoying a last minute romp at a county fair. Lots of vapid chatter about sex and drugs and such.

Then Sara is killed. Only, this being a horror film, nobody notices that she's missing.

Well, these kids meet that night at a graveyard to share ghost stories. Another girl is killed, but again, nobody notices. Only one story is told before it starts to rain. The kids all run into an abandoned shack.

I guess this is the "house of death" of the film's title. It better be, because by now there's only about 10 - 15 minutes left in the film. And the body count has barely begun.

As if our slasher has suddenly realized the film's about to end, he suddenly starts kliing in earnest. Lots of dead kids, with the usual pointless clichés. (When some kids go looking for their friend, they find him dead and hanging upside down -- why do so many slashers hang their victims' bodies upside down?)

The remaining three kids return to the shack, our slasher coming after them. He breaks in and we see that it's... (I won't spoil it, but the identity of the killer is as arbitrary a "surprise" as in most slasher films). Anyway, he's killed by police before he can finish his job.

Three kids -- count 'em, three! -- survive. Two girls and a guy. Yes, one of the survivors was the requisite Good Girl. She should also have been the Last Girl. Unfortunately, our lazy slasher waited so long to get started, the film ran out before he could finish his craft.

And he was a pathetic-looking slasher indeed, once we saw him. Weak and mortal. Not at all the "uberpsycho" (my coinage) that is Michael Myers or Jason Voorhees.

So add House of Death to those other slasher films I recently blogged about, the ones that are missing a Last Girl. Films such as Hide and Go Shriek and Splatter University. The more you examine horror's slasher subgenre, the more you realize that while a Last Girl was a common element, she was by no means universal.

House of Death was produced at E.O. studios, a North Carolina production house that was founded by Earl Owensby. Esquire did a story on him some 25 years ago, painting him as some sort of southern Roger Corman. Owensby also did A Day of Judgment and (I think) he may have been involved with Final Exam, though that film was shot in South Carolina.

Final Exam also has a pretty piss-poor looking slasher. Just some guy in a green army jacket, who doesn't look very tough.

I also recently re-watched The Prey, about a superhuman killer, his body burned long ago in a forest fire, who goes around killing campers. This film has been criticized for being padded with scenes of stock footage of nature, but I suppose that could be justified (i.e., the "theme" of this slasher film is that Nature is predatory, beast "preying" upon beast).

Hey, that fits with the title, no?

The Prey was distributed by Roger Corman's company, and features a cast of unknowns. It's not to be confused with English filmmaker Norman J. Warren's Prey (aka Alien Prey).

Prey is not among Warren's better work. His two best films are Inseminoid (aka Horror Planet) and the Suspiria-inspired Terror (a personal favorite, which I must have seen a dozen or so times over the last 25 years).

No "Last Girl" in Splatter University

I'm eligible to vote for the SAG Awards, but when I checked the ballot this year, it was full of films and TV shows that I'd never seen. Like, none of them!

But how can I be expected to see any of this stuff? I'm too busy watching horror movies, many of which I've seen several times already. Why just these past few weeks I re-watched The Haunting, Slaugther High (to name a few) and ... Splatter University!

Splatter University is one of the cheesiest, crappiest, lowest budgeted of the 1980s many cheesy, crappy, low budget slasher films -- yet I like it a lot!

I'm not sure why, but it's got ... something. Its low budget ambiance is similar to that of Don't Look in the Basement. Harsh lighting (no time to set up fill lights), a hollow echo in many of the scenes (no budget for sound blankets), and a no-name cast. Yet Splatter University is one of the few Troma productions which I enjoy -- this and Mother's Day.

What both these Troma films have is that their humor doesn't overwhelm the horror. Tromo is so low budget, their films are often produced in a campy, tongue-in-cheek style. Splatter University and Mother's Day both have that humor, yet the horror remains intact. You can't say that for most Troma films. In many Troma films, the camp kills the horror. (And usually, their films aren't even funny, because the filmmakers and cast are obviously having too much fun onscreen.)

Lloyd Kaufman told me in the summer of 1981 (when I very briefly worked for Troma) that he thought it was the humor that placed Mother's Day) above the typical splatter fare. I got the impression that Mr. Kaufman did not appreciate the horror genre that much; he seemed to hold a greater affection for comedy, and it shows in Troma's output.

SPOILER ALERT...

If you haven't guessed this already, the Last Girl is (unexpectedly) killed at the end of Splatter University. Stabbed to death in an elevator. (Here she is in an earlier scene, at work, teaching at college).

So it seems that a number of 1980s slasher films (contrary to the cliché) did not have a Last Girl.